Beverly Riston Memorial

April 19, 1916   -   June 23, 2009

 

 

 

To hear the scripture readings and comments from Phil Burton and Pastor Andy Walton at Beverly’s Funeral on June 26, 2009, click the arrow on the audio player below the photograph.  Manuscripts are below the audio player.

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The funeral of

Beverly R. Riston
Capitol Hill Presbyterian Church
Washington, DC
June 26, 2009

 

 

Scripture Readings

 

Psalm 51:10-12

10 Create in me a clean heart, O God,

and put a new and right spirit within me.

11 Do not cast me away from your presence,

and do not take your holy spirit from me.

12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation,

and sustain in me a willing spirit.

 

Psalm 121

 

1 I lift up my eyes to the hills–

from where will my help come?

2 My help comes from the LORD,

who made heaven and earth.

3 He will not let your foot be moved;

he who keeps you will not slumber.

4 He who keeps Israel

will neither slumber nor sleep.

5 The LORD is your keeper;

the LORD is your shade at your right hand.

6 The sun shall not strike you by day,

nor the moon by night.

7 The LORD will keep you from all evil;

he will keep your life.

8 The LORD will keep

your going out and your coming in

from this time on and forevermore.

 

 

Luke 12:27-31

 

27 Consider the lilies, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin; yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not clothed like one of these. 28 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which is alive today and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, how much more will God clothe you–you of little faith! 29 And do not keep striving for what you are to eat and what you are to drink, and do not keep worrying.

30 For it is the nations of the world that strive after all these things, and [God] knows that you need them. 31 Instead, strive for God’s kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well.

For the Word of God in Scripture,
For the Word of God in Creation,
For the Word of God within us…

 

 

 

Comments by Phil Burton

 

 

The day after Beverly’s death, I called one of her oldest friends, Doris Keehn, 95 now and still as sharp and alert as Beverly.  When I asked about their friendship, she laughed and told me about their Sundays after church and how Beverly would call and tell her “Doris, bring your pillow, we’re going for a ride!” Like all of us who had been well-trained by Ms. Beverly, Doris said she did what she was told!  You see, Beverly had stopped driving but still owned a big Ford Taurus, and to drive them to Annapolis, Baltimore, Andrews Air Force Base, or wherever, shorter Doris had to sit on her pillow just to see over the dashboard.

 

Doris laughed again thinking of this command, as many of us here today might laugh at Beverly’s Orders – actually, not so much orders as instructions and training.  During the time we knew her, she trained waiters at places as different as Bread & Chocolate, Pete’s, and at least 3 International House of Pancakes to “Bring my coffee when the meal comes.”  She trained folks like Pastor Andy, Martha & Gene Larkin, Diane Shages, Sue Van Slyke, and Gretchen & Kenny and their families, who cared for her so well, the ‘just so’ sequence of steps required to unlatch the locks at her apartment, coordinate her cane and walker as she descended the steps and take her to lunch, the hairdresser, podiatrist, or the many doctors who cared for her.  My wife, Marla, even said that in a business-like way, she would occasionally approach her and say, “Marla, time for a haircut!”  These instructions were followed without question because, well, Beverly was giving them, they made good sense, and maybe because we were awed that she remained so strong and assertive even in the midst of advancing age and the never-ending pains that she was experiencing.

 

Beverly is with us now, and while she can’t step to the pulpit, if she could, I bet she would look out at us with that severe look she could give and say “What’s the fuss, don’t you know I’m where I wanted to go?, then just as fast, get a twinkle in her eye, flash her mischievous smile, and say “But I’m glad you came.”  Beverly was full of contradictions like that, all of them delightful and endearing.  My list could probably be doubled by many of you, but these are a few of my favorites.

 

·        She was thrifty with every penny, but always picked up the check for whoever took her to lunch, and Beverly gave away her almost-new Taurus when she stopped driving to a family with three severely autistic children.

·        She was traditional and believed in the “old ways,” yet broke two gender barriers at Capitol Hill Presbyterian Church twenty years before the birth of Feminism.  It is hard to believe now, but in 1957, when Beverly and Etta Rowell took their stand, women could not be Elders OR serve communion in our church.  She single-handedly unlocked both of those chains.

·        Of course, Beverly was thin as a reed, but lest you think she dined by the “South Beach Diet,” she never met an IHOP pancake, sausage, or sweet of any kind that she didn’t like – especially the Hershey bars by the box that Dave Levy supplied her that she shared with her caregivers and, on one occasion, a persistent little mouse.

·        She was dignified and dressed formally even for doctors’ visits, but at the church’s 140^th Anniversary Party, it was Beverly who led a chorus-line of church-folk in the Macarana.

·        Beverly genuinely dreaded being the center of attention, but she would speak wonderingly for weeks of the people – “even total strangers! – who greeted her when she came to worship.

·        She lived in the same apartment for sixty years, but in her 80’s traveled with Doris and another of her Golden Girls, Ms. Gladys, to, Germany, Switzerland, Italy, a cruise to Alaska, and her favorite destination of all time – London and its art galleries.

·        As strong as her beliefs in right and wrong, and willingness to share them very bluntly, after doing so she would just as quickly pause, get that ever-ready gleam in her eye, and say, “Well, I guess good people might just think guitar music belongs in a worship service, we don’t need all those paintings in the Fellowship Hall, maybe it isn’t necessary to wear your Sunday best every Sunday – except for shorts(!) — and I guess it’s OK for coffee to come out before the main course is served!”

 

I feel Beverly’s elbow in my side right now and hear her whispering “For Pete’s sake, stop your gushing,” so I will, and take the liberty to add what she might say next.  She would look each of you in the eye and say “I can’t believe you all came here because of me,” smile, and add, “But I’m glad you did.”

 

 

 

Comments by Pastor Walton

 

A little over a year ago early one morning the phone rang.   It was Beverly Riston.  She said, Andy, come quickly I need to talk with you. She was in George Washington University Hospital recovering from surgery to repair a broken hip and had not been doing well at all. As I sat beside her bed the first thing she said was, “Andy, I’ve wasted my life.”

 

Of course, those of us who know Beverly well also know that she would be absolutely appalled that I just shared that with you.  And I’m equally sure most of you, like me that morning, are surprised to hear Beverly said such a thing.  How could she have even imagined that she had wasted her life?

 

Well, without going into the details, she confessed to me that morning that she had failed to have the last days of her life planned out, and that she just didn’t know what was going to happen to her.

 

What I felt like saying, but didn’t, was that little phrase of Beverly’s that if she said it once, she said it a million times, “Oh, Brother!”

 

One thing going on was that for once in her life, Beverly wasn’t in control.   She felt like because she didn’t have a written plan and all the right insurance policies that her life was over.

 

It took some convincing, but between me, Gretchen, Kenny, Phil, Gene and Martha and a host of others we began to show Beverly she had a plan alright, she had just not recognized it, and really neither had we.

 

For you see Beverly had been spending her life rather than saving it.  She had been investing her life in others rather than in herself.

 

At the time she just didn’t realize that the return on these investments was far greater than any long care investment tool she could imagine.  And in 93 years she had made a lot of deposits into that account.

 

The scripture reading we just heard from Luke about the “lilies of the field” was selected by Beverly.  And in this passage we see the way she lived.  In fact, she was a lily of God’s field, clothed greater than the glory of Solomon, both figuratively and literally.  

 

She had a stately air about her that came across as aloof until her thin veneer was cracked.

 

Last fall, uncharacteristically, I went for about three weeks without getting out to Ingleside to see her.   When I walked in her room she was facing the door and upon seeing me immediately said, “Who are you?”

 

That’s when I fell to my knees in front of her chair and begged forgiveness. She then said, “O, Brother!  Get off your knees.  It’s unbecoming.”

 

And of course we all knew one way to reveal the little girl underneath the stately woman was chocolate, and various other sweets.  I’m sure she was the only person at Ingleside who had a metal lockbox for her chocolate bars.  She would share her chocolate, but not with mice.

 

Speaking of sharing, how many of us have been recipients of her generosity, given in numerous ways, and always with discretion and lack of attention to herself.

 

I can’t help but think of the birthday lunches a group of us had with her for several years.  She would take us to one of the nice seafood restaurants on the waterfront, even though she didn’t eat seafood.  And of course she planned and paid for it all.

 

She did love to take people out to brunch, lunch and dinner.  And she had her favorite places, Ihop, Pete’s, and I do think she took it as a sign from God she was close to the end when she learned that Bread and Chocolate had closed.

 

All of these stories are about the end of Beverly’s life.   One of down sides of living so long is there aren’t too many folks around to tell the beginning and middle stories.  

 

What a fascinating life she lived as a professional woman public servant here in Washington DC through the bulk of the 20th century.   The next time you hear someone disparage the government or government employees, tell them about public servant Beverly Riston.

 

Beverly was a world traveler.  She and her traveling companions treked around the world together.  I finally got over being surprised when I would mention a place only to have her say, “Oh yes, I’ve been there.”

 

Beverly was also a pioneer in the church, being one of the first women to be ordained Elder in this congregation and Presbytery.    She delighted in telling the story about the first communion after her ordination when she was told that even though she was ordained women didn’t serve communion.  Her reply was,

“Elders serve communion, and I’m an Elder, therefore I will serve communion.”

I, we, could go on and on with stories.  There are 93 years worth, and most of them about Beverly giving, sharing and investing her life in the lives of those around her.

 

So, in closing and paraphrasing Jesus a bit, I ask you to “consider Beverly Riston, Lily of the Field, clothed in God’s glory, who for the most part did not worry about what she would eat or drink, but instead invested her life in the lives of others, and did her part to create and live the Kingdom of God.”

 

And now that she can’t retort with one of her “Oh, Brother’s!”   I have one final thing to say to Beverly,

“If there was ever a life not wasted, my dear, it was yours.  We all got the most out of it.”